Sunday, July 29, 2012

Awake

This post really doesn't have a point, other than the fact that it's 2 a.m. on Sunday and I'm wide awake. Why? Well, if I knew the answer to that I most definitely would not still be awake, would I?

The fact of the matter is I've always been a 'bad' sleeper. I sleep lightly, so even faint noises wake me. Over the past few years I've gotten really intolerable to heat at night, so if my room is above about 73 degrees I don't sleep well at all. My body is also really susceptible to cycles, so if I decide to stay up late one night then it's really hard to go to sleep before that point the next night, and so on.

But unfortunately for me, the latest I've chosen to go to sleep is about 11 pm, but the night before last I was awake until 2 a.m. and last night I dozed off and on until 5 a.m, when my body finally let me go to sleep.

I know I really shouldn't complain, because I don't have kids and I don't have to be at work until noon, but feeling constantly awake really takes a toll on a body. I am exhausted all day but I try to avoid naps at all costs because they make me stay up at night even longer. As soon as I lay down and close my eyes, my body decides it's time to start thinking about everything.

Lately I've been thinking about moving and how ready I am to be a family again. I think about the projects I want to do before our housewarming party. I think about our first housewarming party that I have yet to really start planning. I think about my sister-in-law's bridal shower I'm beginning to plan. I think about student teaching and graduation, and where my life will go from there. I also think about other things, like "who am I, really?" and "what is my purpose in life?" Those are quite big questions to think about on a tired brain and sometimes I end up with bigger questions than when I started, so I'm trying to stay away from the complicated matters of life during these early hours.

I should be sleeping well. Will is home for the weekend which is such a nice treat. Instead we're re-learning how to share a queen-sized bed and he is definitely winning. He really is so good to me. Two nights ago I threw the covers off me and jumped out of bed, throwing a wee bit of a fit and he sat up to ask what was wrong.

"I'm so hot. And tired. And I can't sleep. I just want to sleep."

Instead of getting mad about me waking him up he just laid back down and basically ignored me, which is really what I need when it's 2 a.m. and I can't go to sleep.

I've tried OTC sleeping pills, which I try not to take too often because I don't want to be dependent on them and they make me sleep (or if I have to wake up, super groggy) for a solid 12-13 hours, and honestly, who has that much time to sleep? I don't drink any caffeine, so that's not the culprit. I think my mission over the next few weeks will be to find some natural remedies that help this situation, because I am tired.

Sorry for the long post over nothing, but there's not a lot going on in other areas of the Internet at 2 a.m. I hope you all have much better success at sleep than I do :)

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Do  you have trouble sleeping? How do you relax in the evenings before bed?

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